The British Curry is one of the greatest inventions ever. They were designed to be eaten with (or after) 6 pints of Lager on a weekly / monthly basis. The hotter it is, the more manly you are - it's a simple fact. Finishing your first Phall is a rite of passage among the curry elite.
This made me chuckle as it reminded of a an old friend who challenged a TA over the phone in a drunken stupor one night. On a lads night out we crashed back to his gaff and decided it was time for a ruby TA. So list in hand he rang the local TA who took his order. At the point of his own specific dish , a Chicken Madras, he got brave and started hurling abuse down the phone about the last Madras he ordered not being hot enough. He added in his own immortal words "make sure you add extra chilli this time, as much as you like!".
Concerned only with my own fast growing need to eat onion bhaji and poppadums etc. we waited for the delivery. 20mins the door bell goes and one of us retrieves the several bags of Curry that was ordered, which is then handed out. Amongst this the familiar tin foil and carded top container with the immortal words Chicken Madras Extra Hot. "That's mine, give it 'ere" were the last words we heard from him that evening.
He opened the container and poured the entire contents over the mountain of Pilau Rice on his plate. Then proceed to take 3 massive and quite quick mouthfuls in his proud display of manliness! This was quickly followed by his face turning a very bright shade of scarlet and his forehead perspiring profusely. Shortly after that, he rushed to the kitchen and downed two pints of water. Before proceeding into the toilet where he spent the next half hour, draped over the porcelain telephone throwing up and groaning in a low tone about how hot his mouth was.
Silly boy! My CTM was lovely
