Now this might sound unusual, but there really does seem to be a marked difference in result, depending on how the raw onion is initially prepared for curry gravy.
I made a recipe from this site which called for pureeing the uncooked onion
This affected the end flavour
It needed a really long cook to lose the bitter flavour it developed, but the finished meal was bursting with flavour
I have made several Pat Chapman recipes which purees raw onion
They all had this bitter taste
But that was because they weren't cooked long enough
I was given another recipe, for curry gravy, and the chef emphasised the need
for finely chopping the onions
Perhaps the missing taste, lies between pureeing, and a fine chop of the onions?